From: "lee gilliland" <leeandalexis at hotmail.com>
To: WSFAlist at keithlynch.net
Subject: [WSFA] Fwd: Turd Twister...
Date: Fri, 08 Mar 2002 17:05:12 -0500
Reply-To: WSFA members <WSFAlist at keithlynch.net>

   International Marketing 101:

   Feudalism
   You have two cows.
   Your lord takes some of the milk.

   Fascism
   You have two cows.
   The government takes both, hires you to take care of them
   and sells you the milk.

   Communism
   You have two cows.
   You must take care of them, but the government takes
   all the milk.

   Capitalism
   You have two cows.
   You sell one and buy a bull.
   Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
   You sell them and retire on the income.

   Enron
   You have two cows.
   You borrow 80% of the forward value of the two
   cows from your bank, then buy another cow with
   5% down and the rest financed by the seller on
   a note callable if your market cap goes below
   $20B at a rate 2 times prime. You now sell three
   cows to your publicly listed company, using letters
   of credit opened by your brother-in-law at a 2nd
   bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an
   associated general offer so that you get four
   cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
   The milk rights of six cows are transferred via
   an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly
   owned by the majority shareholder who sells the
   rights to seven cows back to your listed company.
   The annual report says the company owns eight cows,
   with an option on one more and this transaction
   process is upheld by your independent auditor
   and no Balance Sheet provided with the press
   release that announces that Enron as a major
   owner of cows will begin trading cows via the
   Internet site COW (cows on web).

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