From: "Erica VD Ginter" <eginter at klgai.com>
To: "'WSFA members'" <WSFAlist at keithlynch.net>
Subject: [WSFA] Re: Speel checkers?
Date: Thu, 20 Jun 2002 12:03:48 -0400
Reply-To: WSFA members <WSFAlist at keithlynch.net>

Take a look at www.thespamfiles.com for a novel way to deal with spammers.
Be sure to read the webmasters response to the offer of nude pictures of
Britney Spears; I laughed till I cried. Literally.

Erica
who figures Britney Spears looks like any other teenage girl naked

-----Original Message-----
From: Keith F. Lynch [mailto:kfl at keithlynch.net]
Sent: Wednesday, June 19, 2002 11:01 PM
To: WSFAlist at keithlynch.net
Subject: [WSFA] Re: Speel checkers?

"Michael Walsh" <MJW at mail.press.jhu.edu> wrote:

> So I get this wonderful offer for 14,000,000 email eddresses -
> guaranteed ISP termination proof.

That's right!  Spam those addresses, and NOT ONE of those fourteen
million addresses will be terminated by their ISP!  Guaranteed!

> "This message is a one time mailing and will never be repeated again.

I'm often told that by spammers, and it's always true.  I often get
hundreds of messages identical to that one on the same day, but I
never again get that particular message, e.g. the one sent at 13:24:56
or whenever.

> If you do not respond, you will aoutomatically be removed from our
> database and will not receive any further mailings."

> Aoutomatically?

Spammers are almost as well known for their poor spelling and
atrocious grammar as they are for their stupidity, dishonesty, and
gullibility.  Do a Google search on "frea speach" to learn that it
is the right of every spammer to repeatedly stuff your mailbox with
gigabytes of fraudulent forged garbage and refuse to ever stop.  And
to sue you if you complain.  Not to be confused with "free speech"
which is what spammers make almost impossible on the net.

This afternoon I got spam from a "morgage" [sic] company.

Here are excerpts from replies spammers made to my complaints.
(Each paragraph is from a different spammer):

Go crawl back under the stone you came from. If you send any more
emails to my account you know what the consequencies will be.

We now operate a no spam campaign ourselves and indeed our earlier
encounters where one of the reasons that we now use search engines and
correct listings to market our companies products. We don't even use
that email programme extractor anymore and this I have just deleted so
that the same error cannot occur.

Be mindful that thoughtless or intentionally comprimising the
equipment of providers or putting undue pressure with the intent to do
harm or extort from a ligitimate individual or organization or group
begins to border on racketeering.

And I would like also to apology for any inconvenience that we may
have caused you.

next time you receive UCE just request to be removed from their
mailing list or delete the message . As long as you are using the net
you will always get millions on USE from around the world.

I am sending this response to your office and to a number of
individuals who claim to have received an unsolicited advertisement
from our company Consumer 101.  In the first place our office does not
use e-mail for advertising but we do contract with ethical supplies
that send information over the Internet e-mail addresses.  It is our
understanding that they comply with existing laws in all states.  We
have notified our supplier of the above list and have been assure that
these people will received no information or advertising from their
offices (as a matter of fact most were never on their list).

I'm sorry you got my email, and I'm sorry you had to shut my business
down.  I was just trying to make a few dollars for my education.  I
don't see why you can't just hit the delete button when you get junk
mail instead of opening it up.

You have a lot of nerve for someone in networking! I did NOT spam
you! Your name was aquired through an e-mail list for purchase
company. If you have a complaint, it should be directed towards them
as they are the ones that have given out you e address. But, as you
are a spamwitch hunter and low *&%^, I guess I can understand where
your coming from. You just want to take your bad childhood out on
who ever you can. What's the matter, were you always picked on and
the always the last one to be chosen for games. Now you want to make
trouble for those of us who are trying to make a living. It's not
our fault that your name is on mailing lists. You know, there are
programs out there that block unwanted messages. But I guess you
just like to complain a lot.  Well, you have a good life there in
Arlington Va.

Buddy I am thoroughly impressed.  You really have too much time on
your hands.  BTW, the letter you received was not spam.  It was a
one-time mailing, and many, many, many, man hours went into the
selective targetting that yielded your address.  P.S. there was
no forging- you've read the header wrong.

Sorry, we had problem in our mail server , it sends mail to you.
Please send me yours emails address and we remove it from our server.
The problem was yesterday, you received 3 emails one time, no every day.

Sorry to send you our advertising message, we might be click the
wrong mail list.

If you look closely below, you will see kfl at keithlynch.net received
the message from a safe-list, which by definition cannot be spammed!

I feel your slanderous remarks were unprofessional in the fact that
you made them without considering the company's dispostion on
spamming.  I hope that this information will give you some peace of
mind and remind you that we are not ignorant to the spamming issue at
hand.

Thank you for contacting me.  Are you sure that Top Secrets is a
spam???  I'm very concerned about this.  I just spent so much money
buying there program.  I'll contact them to see what's going. on.  Are
you sure about this?????  Thanks for you time and information about
this good for nothing spam company.  I appreciate you for letting me
know about this.

In the past week I've received 3 people sending e-mails to both me
and the abuse team at home.com saying I spammed them.  I didn't even
know what they were talking about.  I know what this whole game is
all about and I've learned my lesson.  I'm deeply sorry for the
inconvenience that this has caused and I'm immediately discontinuing
this thing.  I never knew what this thing was all about until today.

Sorry for spamming you.  Can you please forgive me?  I won't do it
again.  I thought that spamming was having a return e-mail that
doesn't exist?  Again, I'm very sorry for sending you the e-mail.
I'll never send UCE again. Please accept my deep apologies.  Why
aren't those crooks at top secrets in jail yet?  Were you in Fortune
5000?  Please reply.  We need to do something.

First, Top Secrets is not a pyramid scheme, if you want to know more
research the company. Second I would like to know where you obtained
the information that Top Secrets, Inc is operating illegally. You
are referring to a reputable company that has been registered to do
business all over the United States and Canada. Every Attorney General
in this country has a file on the company and knows exactly what this
business is about. Therefore, I will ask you to cease the spreading of
your lies and rumors or YOU WILL BE SUED FOR DEFAMATION.

I propose that you have not received over 1000 emails over the last
2 years. With 365 days in a year that would amount to 730 if you
received 1 every single day. You are claiming that you received an
average of more than 1 per day every single day for the last 2 years,
I say you are a liar. Prove me wrong and send me the emails you
received for the last 30 days. I would venture to say that maybe you
received a few dozen emails and you are grossly exaggerating.  If you
would lie about the number of emails you received I wonder what sort
of business you are in?

Can you please write a letter to home.com and let them know how sorry
I am and that I won't be doing this again?  I don't want to lose my
accoung.  Please write them a letter.  They'll listen to you.

You can take your lying threats and stick them up your ass.  This is
an honest business.  Quit your fucken bitchen, and get a life.  That's
what's wrong with america today.  To many damn soft ass cry babies
like yourself.  Women use to have something to be proud of, now we
have man who cry over fucken email.  Do what you have to, you are
still a lying fucken cry baby.  Now send they this too!

your credit cards have been reported stolen
your registration and license expire friday
your utilities will be shut off friday
your tax return has been flagged to appear
on my desk the moment it arrives
have a nice day

Please expain Spamming to me.  I'm just a sculptor that paid a company
to mail my web page to respective clients.  I'm a little bet in the
dark here.  Please let me know what seems to be the problem with this
transaction and I will try to remedy the problem.

It was not our intent to send you spam e-mail, nor to send the message
4 times, it was a software error and wasn`t meant to happen, you have
been collected as a mailing list memeber, and you are now removed.

Sorry about the "spam".  I am new to this stuff and just started a
business.  I bought a program that is supposed to help me do mailings
in the San Francisco bay area.  I had an email account when I bought
the program and got another when I started my business.

Considering the fact that I am new and self taught, I don't understand
this. What is it that I have done that prompted all this, I simply
followed the instructions supplied by the program sellers. I really
would appreciate some help here. I didn't think that there was
anything wrong with announcing my web sites existance.

We as a company were duped into believing a marketing company would do
a legal campaign to an ad friendly list.  This is the first time that
we have done anything like it and I can assure you the last.  We have
corrected the situation.  I apologize for the inconvenience.

I have spent the last 16 months teaching myself graphics so that I
could have a web site that I hoped would make me an income.  I am a
59 year old, 100% permanantly disabled veteran and get a pension of
$730.00 a month because my injurys aren't service connected.  I have
no hospitalization and no other income, which wouldn't matter, because
I lose dollar for dollar if I make any.  This web site of mine was
what might get me back into life again, but I have already gotten
notices from my affiliate companys to take their ads down. All I was
trying to do was get some people to go to my G-Rated site, I'm not a
pornographer, or other sex peddler.  I am the former head of the Ohio
Attn Generals Undercover Narcotics unit, but it seems that nobody
cares when your on the bottom, no fault of your own. Thanks to your
letters, I guess that I can assume that this business is also
finished.

My email account may be got canceled,please explain to my ISP IN 3
DAYS and reset my account or I will tell all of my visitors about you
post one message on trade board and you are not a business man and
report the reply as SPAM.  Please,explain to all of you have reported
and make my account reset in 3 days or I have to tell all friends what
you've done to me.My be some friend will help me.

I have no Idea what this person is talking about.  We mail to a small
opt in list and if this person would like to get off of our list they
can by calling our toll free 888 number or clicking on our remove
link.  We abide by all laws and regulations of ethical mailing.  We
should stop this complainer from wasting our time and money!  Person,
please go do something better with your time and just ask to be
removed next time!

Hello, my name is Alex Libman, I am the author of the CyberCrafts
newsletter (which you for some reason consider to be 'spam').  Well,
I always knew that all those complaints were caused by kids with
too much free time on their hands; but I until I found your post
on Usenet, I never knew which specific group of individuals is
responsible for my company's $230 loss, plus the loss of countless
hours of hard work on my part.  Since my company (ThinkTank Online
Services) is a profit-free organization, this sum is a big damage for
us.  Let me start from the beginning.  We inherited the subscription
base from another newsletter which recently went off-line.  I do not
wish to compromise the reputation of that newsletter by mentioning
it's title publicly.  The procedure of "subscription inheritance" is
not only completely legal, but it is how the majority of e-zines gets
a head start.  We don't know if the list we purchased was partially
fabricated or if those people who complained are simply confused; all
I know is that my company never intentionally did anything deviant or
illegal.

I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HE IS TALKING ABOUT...GLOBAL LINKS NETWORK SENT
THE EMAIL OUT FOR ME AT A CHARGE OF $150, AS MY OUTLOOK PROGRAM IS NOT
SUITABLE FOR SENDING OUT 15,000 EMAILS.

Second, our remove list filters out over 30,000,000 e-mail addresses
prior to any mail.  In checking our logs, I see that your e-mail
address was entered into our remove log just today as we electronically
scanned your complaint letter.

How does this cost you money?  Are you terminally ill so that your
time is actually valuable?

You have received a bogus complaint from an unknown person hiding
under the address of kfl at keithlynch.net.  We need to find out his/her
true identity so we can take legal action for interference with our
business by using a phone line across state lines which is a felony.
We have checked all our databases and the address of kfl at keithlynch.net
is not there.  We have contacted the FBI with a request for a thorough
investigation of this individual.

Do you know that one in four Americans die from cancer?  It is going
to get you soon... I promise.  Hope somebody in your family dies real
soon. (That is not a threat.. I just sincerely hope that members of
your family die soon; car accident, accidental poisoning, electrocution,
shot by police, burned at the steak, etc.)

Why, when I send a person an e-mail to join, you killed my account?
Your name is on an opt-in mailing list asking for free offers and
then you gets tired of it and report it as spam.  This is not right.
I could say all my e-mail is spam, and get everyones account killed.
This is not right. I did not send any spam. I buy my mailing lists
from CO. out there that are supposed to know better.

I am new at this. And after the letter a got from you I deleted the
mail list. I DON'T want to be sending spam. I DON'T WANT TO bother
people. I was told these names were willing receipients for my mail.
Now I have no business to run, (my offshore consultants business that
i worked so hard to get up and running is now dead, Thanks to you.
You could have asked me to remove you from the list and asked then who
sold it to me and i would have gave you that info.. I deleted it and
am sitting here out alot of money because you did'nt ask me why I sent
you mail.  My childeren will have less for christmas, But then again I
was never able to give them much due to illness anyway.

This is the third complaint that I have received from you regarding
mail from the RL3 group and the second time I have addressed it with
you.  This time I want to make sure that everyone that you 'complain'
to knows what is going on.  The RL3 guys are a legitimate, opt-in
permission e-mail marketing group.  They purchase their lists from
reliable, opt-in list providers.  This is the reason that they have
not been 'shut down'.