Date: Fri, 30 Sep 2005 00:52:37 -0400 To: WSFA members <WSFAlist at WSFA.org> From: Elspeth Kovar <ekovar at worldnet.att.net> Subject: [WSFA] Re: I will NOT calm down (was Re: Extremely offensive...) Reply-To: WSFA members <WSFAlist at WSFA.org> At 02:35 PM 9/29/2005, Walter Miles wrote: >It is NO help to her to pretend that this attack is reasonable >disagreement or difference in point of view, that we don't feel >embarrassed for her, that we don't feel uneasy about what she'll >do next, or that things are essentially normal. It's not good >for WSFA either: pretty soon Keith won't be the only one who >feels unwelcome. Two people, husband and wife, have long since stopped attending WSFA meetings or being involved in anything WSFA does including Capclaves because they cannot stand to be around Lee Gilliland. I haven't checked to see how long they've been members but they joined far before I did, and it is our great loss. I don't know how many others there are; these told me when I asked for their assistance in promoting Capclave among their contacts. I have said privately and now say publicly that unless Lee is told that her accusations, threats, whispering campaigns and all the rest must stop I cannot and will not attend any further meetings at her home. Moreover, I will publicly announce that I am no longer attending meetings there and why such that it will be placed in the minutes. If the general rule that no negative comments about someone can be published in the Journal -- and there has only been one time since I joined WSFA that such comments have been published -- I am willing to phrase what is published as "Given various matters I can no longer attend the First Friday meetings. I am very sorry, as this will decrease my effectiveness as a WSFAn, as Facilities Liaison, and as Capclave 2005 chair. It will also take away one of the pleasures in my life, and there are people who attend only that meeting whom I will not have a chance to see. However, I have no choice in this matter." I am sorry for this, as Alexis has been hosting WSFA meetings since, I think, before I was born and I care for him greatly. But Lee's behavior cannot and should not be condoned. Announcing why I am no longer attending those meetings will probably result in more of the phone calls I've gotten now and then over the past couple of years, being woken out of a sound sleep to be yelled at, often incoherently. But at least they will finally stop, I will no longer have to put up with her going off at me in public for whatever crime she's decided I've committed, having to always be braced for them because one can never know what she's going to get into her head and when, and a major cause of stress in my life will be gone. I concede that it might make sense to wait until after Capclave to take her to task: we have a convention less than three weeks away and the club *must* be focused on it. At the same time this latest irrationality on her part has kept me from doing much needed work with our hotel, with our resume (room sets, doors being locked and unlocked, menus, signatories, meetings that I have to have with various managers, and on and on. This behavior absolutely must stop. If it results in our having to find another meeting place in Virginia I'm sorry to say that that would be less detrimental to the club than the ever-increasing problems that Lee has caused. It also should be mentioned that Keith does not need defending, although he does need to be told that we support him: we all know that these attacks are ludicrous and reflect entirely upon the accuser, not upon him. He has been entirely honorable; has time and again worked very hard to deal with Lee in a rational manner despite her irrationality; and has put up with far, far, far more than any person should be forced to. And he's done so while excellently doing the work for WSFA that he pledged to do. Keith, thank you. Elisabeth Kovar