Date: Wed, 12 May 2010 21:15:51 -0400
From: "Mike B." <omni at omniphile.com>
To: WSFA members <WSFAlist at KeithLynch.net>
Subject: [WSFA] Re: re: The eyes, they bleed!  The brain, it hurts!
Reply-To: WSFA members <WSFAlist at KeithLynch.net>

mark wrote:

> Heh. Reminds me of the textbook covers from when I was in high school, back
> when the world was very young: Lion Taming Made Easy, by Claude Balls; Mountain
> Climbing Made Easy, by Hugo First....

"Yellow River", by I. P. Freeley, "A History of Elevators", by Upson
Downes, "Twenty Yards to the Out House", by Willie Makit, illustrated by
Betty Wownt and Doris Loked,  "Under the Bleachers", by Seymour
Butts...and many more.  Someone put together a list of them here:

http://dan.hersam.com/lists/books_never_written.html

They are mixed in with a list of "The World's Thinnest Books", with
titles such as:

Different Ways to Spell "Bob"
Everything Men Know About Women
Everything Women Know About Men
George Foreman's Big Book of Baby Names
Staple Your Way to Success
The Amish Phone Book
The Engineer's Guide to Fashion
Things I Wouldn't Do for Money by Dennis Rodman
Al Gore: The Wild Years
Janet Reno's Beauty Secrets

Click and Clack, the Tappet Brothers, do similar things with their staff
listing at the end of every show.  The list changes over time, but some
examples are:

Head of the working mothers' support group: Erazmus B. Draggin
Figure Skating Coach - Landon McKeaster
Gas Tank Welder - Stan Beck
Martial Arts Trainer - Anita Degroin
Accounts Payable Administrator - Imelda Czechs
Animal Control Officer - Turner Luce
Auto Seat Tester - Fitz Matush
Car Talk Opera Critic - Barbara Seville
Chief Accountant - Candace B. Rittenoff
Director of Ethics & Honesty - U. Lyon Sack
Russian Chauffeur - Picov Andropov
Statistician - Marge Innovera
Personal Makeup Artist - Bud Tuggli

Lots more at http://www.cartalk.com/content/about/credits/credits.html

-- Mike B.