Date: Wed, 10 Sep 2003 22:23:26 -0400 (EDT)
From: "Keith F. Lynch" <kfl at KeithLynch.net>
To: WSFA members <WSFAlist at KeithLynch.net>
Subject: [WSFA] Unclean!  Unclean!
Reply-To: WSFA members <WSFAlist at keithlynch.net>

I went to donate blood this evening here in Virginia.  They rapidly
asked me the usual questions.  As always, I automatically answered
each one "no".  No, I have not exchanged drugs for sex with someone
who received a dura matter transplant in the Congo since 1977, nor
have I received a tattoo from a drug-addicted leper with a family
history of CJD who takes tegison and finasteride.  But wait, what's
this?  Why yes, I have been to Toronto.  Why yes, in the past two
weeks.

My answer was greeted with apparent skepticism, as if I'd claimed to
have survived being buried up to the neck in radioactive anthrax
spores at ground zero while two skyscrapers dropped on me.  The nurse
asked me several times exactly when I arrived there and left, as if
hoping to catch me in a contradiction.

She then spent several minutes pawing through a loose-leaf notebook,
then went to consult with her supervisor, then spent several more
minutes leafing through the same notebook, then asked me if I had been
exposed to anyone at risk, then leafed some more, then went out again,
then came back and gave me a deferral letter.

It's strange how one can't help but take even the most obviously bogus
judgments slightly seriously.  I *have* had difficultly breathing
recently, haven't I, asked a little voice in the back of my head.
Well, I did briefly choke on a pistachio that went down the wrong way.
But that was *before* Torcon.  Maybe that means I'm saddled with an
especially virulent strain of SARS, one which has effects even before
the original exposure.  Also, haven't I been sleeping more than usual
since returning?  Since that's not one of the usual symptoms, I must
have been hit with a potent strain indeed!

And to think that not only did I bring this dread infection across the
previously impenetrable barrier of Toronto's city limits, but I've
also ridden both the New York and DC subways.  No doubt the plague has
spread to millions of Americans by now, thanks to me.

Oh why did I ever listed to the Torcon committee when they claimed
their city was clean?  Sure, it *looked* clean.  But had it been
heated to at least 250 Fahrenheit for at least 2 hours?  I don't
think so.  It hasn't escaped my notice that they use *Celsius* there.

-- Keith "unclean" Lynch
--
Keith F. Lynch - kfl at keithlynch.net - http://keithlynch.net/
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